Share your spiritual awakening..

[nicholas.tangaroa]

What were your personal experiences that made you aware that you were a spiritual being?
Personally I went through a lot of emotional trauma, and a lot of negative experiences before "waking" up to who I was.. Now that I have past that stage of my life, I have been allowed to reflect on my past experiences.. And fully realise the positive spiritual being that I now have become!
What is it that you experienced?
Or was it always part of social norm?
Religion?
Family or friends?

[wishingmoon]

For me it has always been a part of my life, my mother had this influence on me.

[Spirited Away]

One of the factors that led to my spiritual awakening came when my aunt passed away in 2000. We knew that she was sick and that the end could come at any moment, we just didn't know how long it would be. The night before she died, I dreamt of her, and she was saying goodbye. The next morning, my mother came into my room and told me that she had passed away. I didn't cry or react negatively because I already knew.

I think my spiritual awakening came a couple of years later, when I was in eighth grade. I had started to read about Wicca, Paganism, New Age, etc., and it all felt right to me. I started dabbling in Tarot, using pendulums to answer questions, and trying to contact the spirit world. I frequented the few New Age bookstores that were available to me. Everything seemed to make sense to me at those moments. The following year, a friend and I had an English class together, and we would do Tarot for our classmates (our teacher didn't care much for teaching). That same year, we encountered a spirit at our school, although we've yet to figure who it was. That solidified it for me. I knew there was more to life than what most humans encounter on a daily basis. There were other forces and beings at work that some were aware of, and I was one of them.

I'm still continuing my spiritual journey, and I know I will be for a very long time. Sometimes I falter in believing that I am a spiritual being, but I always find my way back. I hope that as time goes on, I will more readily accept my spiritual nature as an inevitability.

[Abu Taj al Deen]

Asalaamu alaykum wa rahmahtullahi wa barakatuh brothers and sisters in Islam.

As I have probably alluded to in past posts, I am a revert to Islam. Not a new Muslim, however. I came to Islam many years ago. Alhamdulillah.

I just thought I'd take a quick time out from my usual posting to post up my revert story for one and all to see.

When I embraced Islam, I was still a teenager, alhamdulillah. Not even yet legally considered an 'adult', in the Australian context of the word.

Before coming to Islam, I indentified myself as Agnostic, and rather indifferent towards all organised religion. I was very critical of religion, and religious people - but that all changed over time.

It all began as I was supposed to be studying for highschool exams, but was instead Googling around the internet. I was just doing the usual - you know, time wasting, reading, looking up things of interest. When I had remembered a lot of media hype about Muslims in Australia, thus sparking my curiousity. I Googled around to find a Muslim news group online, which I in turned joined to ask some questions. From this, I not only had my questions answered, but over a legnthy stay made a lot of friends and contacts.

Honestly, if I was asked about my participation at the time I would have told anyone 'I'll stay until I lose interest', which couldn't be too long. I'd been through so many phases of my interest in the past that I initially saw this as the same as any other. I'd also participated in so many online communities in my time on the internet that I could already see myself (in the future) growing inactive and moving on, as I always seem to do.

For some reason this time it was different, I stuck around for a long time. I engaged in discussion on this site and numerous others, and even took such discussion to secular sites for differing views. I would always stick up for Islam, despite in the past being quite critical of it and all other religions. Online, or in person.

Only a couple of months later, in a book store I came across an English translation of the Qur'an - so going along with my current interest, I purchased it and began reading. At home, at school, on the train. I was just forever reading it. Now, my mistake was buying a copy that was in Shakespearean English (yes, 'thou', 'thee' etc.) it really confused me more - so to be honest. Even an English translation of the Qur'an, at the time I didn't understand. However, in all other areas with Islam I was met with nothing but agreement. Islam had a certain appeal to commonsense I had never seen in any kind of ideology before. I was in a bind.

After more reading, more questions, and finding a more 'user-friendly' translation of the Qur'an - and after a few more months. I was set, I was intent, it was in my heart. Islam is perfect, in a perfect world I would be a Muslim. But I was so scared. My friends, my family, my classmates. What would they think of me?

A new mission arose in my head. I knew, after so long (as it had become truly more than just a phase) and so much intellectual activity/time invested in my research of the deen I couldn't just drop it like it never happened. If I was to do that, to me it would always seem like unfinished business and I'd possibly come back to it. My new mission was to find something in Islam that would close my heart to the deen so I can leave humouring the possibility of becoming a Muslim to rest, and make history of it. For further months I searched. I wanted to find that weak spot, that flaw.

Alhamdulillah, this search brought me to a crossroad. I had to choose the way of life I knew and have been living my whole life (which, I now saw as false, and that I wasn't at peace with) - or go for a new life, one full of changes and unfamiliarity. But one I was content with, and felt right about. One that satisfied me in every way.
In the end, it was a no-brainer. I went with the new way of life. The one my heart had warmed to. The one I loved, and still love.

Alhamdulillah, I said the shahada - this was many years ago too.
It was the best thing I did in my entire life.

Wasalaam

[Sebastyne]

I grew up in a fairly religious home as far as my father was concerned, my mother was more of an agnostic, who was more concerned about propriety than actual faith. With my father I was always influenced by the spiritual world, although I questioned some of the things the Bible taught us. I had a major problem with god's vindictive nature, and a certain pettiness of his, but I let it slide for the first two decades of my life. I then started dating an atheist. He attacked my beliefs repeatedly, and I defended them, fiercely, at the same time as a friend of his was talking a lot about reincarnation and the sort of things. I found her stories fascinating, but I still defended my faith to my boyfriend. Once we split up, I decided it was time to question my own beliefs and look for answers within. I decided not to read anything religion-related and not listen to anyone, but simply go inwards and see what I find. I decided nobody was big enough of an authority in these matters to dictate to me what was true and what was not. In two weeks I left the church forever. I had found that I do believe in reincarnation and a God that doesn't really concern himself with things like sin or rules. I believed in a logical, fair and loving god, qualities that didn't fit the christian god, especially the two first mentioned. I decided that the true God had to be more understanding, more logical, more forgiving and more loving than I was, and the Christian God wasn't. So... That's where it started.